The Beauty of Staying at Home

I have found that the days with two 2.5 year olds are much more successful if you have a plan. A great day consists of a strong dose of easygoing free play time, an interactive activity or two, a little time outside and maybe an errand or a short outing, all within the background of home maintenance, meals, cleanup, etc. Most of the time I have such a plan in the back of my mind.

But every once in a while I awaken in a different space. It's the "I don't have to get dressed if I don't want to, the chores can wait 'til later, or even tomorrow and nobody will care" mode. And that is the beauty of staying home with the children. When that mood hits, you can go with it. There's little to no room for listening to biorhythms in the workaday career world. No matter how I felt, I would don the professional clothing, slap on the makeup, fix my hair, and conquer the classroom.

Of course there are days when I think that staying home with two-year-olds is the hardest job in the world, but I mostly remind myself that these years are so fleeting and I'll never have them again, that there are some benefits that I never could enjoy while working, and that I am ever so fortunate to be able to fully raise my own children.

Brownie Points

Ah, to have a good husband. After coughing all night and only dozing off sometime after 3am, my dear husband took the day off for me. He got me medecine, took care of the kids, swam with them in their lesson, made a fort with the dining room table, played hide and seek, bathed them, and let me rest when I needed it. I never would have asked him to do that, and how nice that he just knew. Perhaps choosing a mate for life is THE most important decision one has to make in life. Boy, I did well on that one...

The Honeymoon Period Arrives Later With Twins

Twins.. they are so hard in the beginning. I remember the double nursing, juggling two slippery little bodies, the milk coming too fast and Eli screaming about it, NEVER being able to nurse in public unless I wanted to be showered with mardi gras beads! (there is no way to nurse twins discreetly), and finding myself in the grocery store with my shirt on inside out because it was a mad dash--nurse the babies, get 'em dressed, throw them in the car seats, to the car, grocery shop in a mad hurry, not with a shopping cart but with the double stroller that doesn't really have room for everything you need unless you pack it like a jigsaw puzzle, and rush home to....nurse again. Oh my GOD...

Then came the tag-teaming: "While mom is removing Evie and telling her not to climb the fireplace, I can get away with ....climbing the fireplace." I kid you not, I spent two hours straight teaching that the fireplace is a "no". And my personal favorite, learning to share toys.....when they are six months old!

After that was the the running away in two different directions phase, both toward impending doom, and my having to decide which one I must chase after first, the one toddling down a steep hill into a rock bed, or the one who has just figured out how to open the gate to the freedom of the open road! Next was watching them climb two different equally death-conjuring park ladders way before they should be able to and trying to convince 18 month olds, that they cannot climb at the same time...like they have that concept down!!

But it really does get easier, and it the investment of time and care is really paying off now. Eli and Evelyn are such good friends. Of course they have their conflicts at times, but for the most part, they make up games together, tackle each other on the floor, take turns with toys and bring each other snacks, shoes, and books. They will have the huge advantage of knowing what marriage is like twenty or thirty years before they even meet their soul mate. And while they play, I can actually get some things done around the house...finally.

Shameless Bragging

Here are some of the sweetest things my kids have said that make me proud.


When our playing accidentally caused a personal injury to Pat:

"That wasn't your fault mommy. That was my fault." -Eli

When Eli inadvertantly knocked Evie down:

"I'm okay. It was just an accident." --Evie

At the park, before the kiddos were 2.5 years old:

"Mom, the black swing is available." --Eli

Nearly every day:

"I found a really beautiful bug, mom." --Eli

"It's my turn now."
"One more minute."
"Okay." --Eli and Evie

Pretending to talk to Mimi on the phone:

"It was Mimi. She fell off a dolphin. She's okay though." --Evie

My Cutie Pea

My little girl is getting so big. She loves to make tea parties and create "special treats" for everyone with her pretend food. She takes great care of her baby by reading it stories and taking her for walks in the stroller. She wants to do things her own way without interference in the process. One of her favorite things to do is to figure out what the animal needs. The animal is whatever Eli has decided to become. She brings him food, tries to pet him, and offers him particular toys she thinks he might like to play with. I love my Evie!

Our Unconventional Vacation

Many don't understand this, but some people do. Pat had been working often six days a week, and therefore I was always with the kids. We both needed a break, and we both needed some alone time.

I found a beautiful little cabin in the middle of Castle Valley, a homespun little hay bail house. Pat went for four days by himself. Then he came home and I left for the cabin, for four glorious days by myself. We each did yoga, hiked, read books, and basically basked in the silence, taking time to remember that we are individuals with our own separate desires outside of our roles as parents, spouses, and professionals.

We love our intertwined lives and we deeply cherish our family, but we also must nurture ourselves, and we did just that. Maybe our next vacation will be together as a family, but it will be a close race.

Ny New "Do"

I went in for a haircut and decided to make a change. One day I love it, the next day I hate it. I have decided to stick with it for a month to see if I get used to it. I suppose it would look a lot better if I didn't always pair it with jeans and a sweatshirt, but I am too cheap and practical to bother being fashionable while chasing 2 year olds around and cleaning house!

Fall Fun

The kids had a lot of fun playing in the leaves in the front yard and they loved Halloween. We weren't sure if we'd get Evie's costume on her this year (Remember the mad cow?) but once we told her she had to wear it in order to trick or treat she put on her Elmo suit with pride. She only wanted to be Elmo because she has declared red as one of her favorite colors and we just couldn't find a red kitty cat. Eli was a duck, because yellow is his favorite color. This may be a twin thing, but whatever color he likes, she can't like, and vice versa. I don't know how those identicals' parents ever get their kids to wear the same clothes! Mine would fight that to the death, and I wouldn't blame 'em.

Life in Utah

I was inspired by my good friends to keep this updated, but it has been a long time, so I won't attempt to fill you in on everything in between. We have been in Salt Lake City now for about nine months and, although we definitely miss our close family and friends, we are enjoying the new lifestyle here in Salt Lake, namely city life, more sunshine, and a very family oriented area. We have managed to make some good friends in Nina and Randy, who live only a few blocks away and also have a boy and a girl, and have gotten back in touch with a very close friend from high school, Emily and her family. The kids stay occupied with walks in the (huge) cemetery across the street, swimming lessons, story time at the library and playing with each other.

I have started in on my parent coaching studies and am very excited to put my skills to use once I am through. November 8th I attended a four-day conference and had the opportunity to meet my fellow students. Brain research was the main topic, and now I can tell you in full depth why my kids don't watch very much TV! It was very valuable.

We don't know how long we'll be here, but we do know that we'd rather stay than be sent somewhere else. We like our remodeled 1908 house, the sunshine, the parks in close proximity, our new friends, and our neighborhood. We might even settle on in if we can get all of our loved ones to relocate!